When most people think about prison, they think about punishment, security, and confinement. Much less attention is paid to one of the most fundamental aspects of human existence: the need for meaningful human connection.
A recent reflection published by former federal prisoner David Dorson offers a rare and insightful look into an often-overlooked aspect of incarceration—the challenge of forming and maintaining friendships while behind bars.
His observations remind us that, regardless of the crimes for which individuals have been convicted, imprisonment does not erase their humanity. Nor does it eliminate the basic psychological need for companionship, trust, and belonging.
“You Don’t Go to Prison to Make Friends”
New prisoners are often warned not to trust anyone and are encouraged to “do their own time.” The advice is understandable. Correctional institutions can be intimidating environments where vulnerability is often perceived as weakness.
Many prisoners enter custody carrying feelings of shame, fear, and uncertainty. They are separated from spouses, children, friends, and communities. For some, incarceration means the collapse of relationships built over a lifetime.
Yet human beings are social creatures. Even in environments built around separation and control, people seek connection.
As Dorson observes, prisoners often begin by interacting with one another on a purely practical level: learning institutional routines, understanding informal rules, and finding ways to navigate daily life. Over time, however, those interactions frequently evolve into something more meaningful.
The Reality Behind the Stereotypes
Popular culture often portrays prisons as places inhabited exclusively by dangerous and violent individuals. While violence certainly exists within correctional institutions, the reality is far more complex.
Many prisoners discover that those around them are not radically different from themselves. They encounter people struggling with addiction, mental illness, poverty, trauma, and poor decision-making. They meet individuals who are kind, generous, intelligent, humorous, and supportive.
Dorson describes finding companionship among fellow prisoners through shared work assignments, educational programs, recreation, and simply living together in the same housing units. These connections became an important source of stability and emotional support during his incarceration.
His experience echoes what correctional researchers have long understood: positive social relationships can play a significant role in helping incarcerated individuals cope with confinement and prepare for successful reintegration into society.
A Challenge for the Wrongfully Convicted
For individuals who maintain their innocence, imprisonment often carries an additional burden.
Wrongfully convicted individuals may experience profound isolation. They frequently feel disconnected not only from family and friends but also from other prisoners. Some struggle with the emotional conflict of living among people who have accepted responsibility for crimes while they continue to insist they were convicted in error.
The psychological toll can be immense.
Many exonerees have described prison as an experience of chronic loneliness. Maintaining hope often depends upon support from family members, advocates, volunteers, and occasionally fellow prisoners who provide friendship and encouragement during extraordinarily difficult circumstances.
For these individuals, human connection can become a lifeline.
The Temporary Nature of Prison Friendships
One of the most poignant observations in Dorson’s article concerns the impermanence of prison relationships.
People are constantly arriving and departing. Transfers occur. Sentences end. Some prisoners are released while others remain behind. As a result, many incarcerated individuals become reluctant to invest emotionally in new friendships, knowing that separation is inevitable.
Even those relationships that become meaningful often fade after release.
Former prisoners frequently wish to distance themselves from that chapter of their lives as they attempt to rebuild careers, relationships, and reputations. Connections that were essential for survival inside prison often disappear once freedom is regained.
The result is a strange paradox: friendships forged under extraordinary circumstances may be deeply important at the time, yet exist only within the confines of incarceration.
Rehabilitation Requires Human Relationships
Correctional systems frequently emphasize programs, risk assessments, and behavioural interventions. While these tools have value, they sometimes overlook a simple truth: people change through relationships.
Research consistently demonstrates that social support is one of the strongest predictors of successful reintegration following release from prison. Individuals who maintain positive family relationships, supportive friendships, and meaningful community connections are generally less likely to reoffend and more likely to achieve stability.
This raises an important question: if healthy relationships are critical to rehabilitation, are our correctional systems doing enough to foster them?
Policies that unnecessarily restrict contact with family members, limit communication, or discourage positive social interaction may inadvertently undermine the very goals of rehabilitation and public safety.
Remembering the Humanity Behind the Label
The public often sees prisoners through the lens of their offences. Yet every person in custody remains a human being with hopes, fears, strengths, weaknesses, and a need for connection.
Recognizing this reality does not excuse criminal conduct. Rather, it acknowledges a fundamental principle: people cannot be reduced solely to the worst moment of their lives.
At Miscarriage of Justice Canada, we are particularly mindful of this truth because wrongful conviction cases remind us that not everyone in prison belongs there. History has repeatedly shown that innocent individuals can be convicted and incarcerated. When that happens, the importance of maintaining human dignity becomes even more apparent.
Whether guilty or innocent, every incarcerated person remains a member of the human family. Understanding that reality is essential if we are serious about creating a justice system that values rehabilitation, fairness, and human dignity.
The walls of a prison may separate people from society, but they do not eliminate the need for friendship, compassion, and human connection. In many ways, those needs become even more important once the prison gates close behind them.